Is an insult followed by a compliment the new pick up technique nowadays?

“tee hee hee, thank you.”

Hola!  Yesterday I wrote a blog on undergarments and when it’s appropriate to wear them for function versus appeal… well, sorta.  You can read about it here.

In said post, I made mention of a guy that threw in an insult, followed it with a compliment (albeit an inappropriate one), then seemed shocked when his master plan of getting laid didn’t work out.

Three quick tips for the single men out there:

  1. When trying to pick up a lady, check out her ring finger.  If there is a ring on that finger, don’t expect much more than friendly banter.  Sadly this is not always the case, but your potential dating/ hooking up percentages go up significantly when trying to pick up a single lady versus an obviously non single lady at a bar.  That way you can move on and not waste anyone’s time (including your own).
  2. Throwing insults and/or making mention of any body part that would normally be covered by a bikini is not a good idea.  The lady will look at you with disgust and treat you accordingly.  This can range from walking away, throwing a drink in your face, emasculating you verbally, or if you’re really out of line, some sort of physical assault to your groin area.
  3. (Appropriate) compliments are always a good thing.

If you’re semi-good looking, confident, and have no overt flaws, there is no doubt in my mind you will hook up with someone in a place where they serve alcohol, no matter what comes out of your mouth.  But keep in mind, it will be just that…a hook up.

Probably a drunk hook up with an insecure girl who will make it her nights mission proving just how attractive she is to you.  This will not be a long term relationship type of girl.  Not the girl you can take home to mom.  And definitely not the minimal baggage type of girl either.

I want to be very clear, I am not talking about one night stands, cause let’s be honest, everyone I know over 18 has had at least one (no matter how classy they turn out to be).  I’m talking about girls that can take a stranger’s insults and turn them into some sort of challenge.  It’s sad because relationship cycles like this perpetuate their insecurities (anywho, that’s for a more serious blog).

What’s my point?  If you want to hook up with hot, not so hot insecure girls, by all means… go for it.  But if you’re looking for a girl with a little more to her, follow the 3 tips above.

Random online dating tip (or first date tip):

  • Guys should always pay for the first date…yes, I said always.  But girls should always offer and say thank you (after the guy rejects their offer).

For the cheapies out there, think of it as an investment in your future.  This is the first date.  Try to court a little, even if you don’t like her enough for a second date.

You never know if she has a hot friend she can refer you to.  Last thing you want is to be known as the cheap guy to all her friends on cyberspace.

What are some pick up techniques you follow?  Do they work?  Is a simple introduction over-rated?  Who pays on a first date?

Would love to hear from you!

*help me rule the world and follow me on twitter: @angiegomez1010 *



25 responses to “Is an insult followed by a compliment the new pick up technique nowadays?

  1. Like I said on the previous article, I would’ve done the same thing the dooshbag did. A semi- insult (negs as we call them in the pick-up community) followed by a calculating compliment is basically our shtick. The guy obviously miscalibrated (which happens), so wasn’t able to recover.

    As expected; guys paying on the first date is a NO No for pick-up artists. We make girls pay on first dates, or we go Dutch.

    What’s your take on Dutch??

    • there’s a name for it? you guys must have signed up for the same course! i think this technique works great for getting laid (with insecure girls or girls just looking for a hook up with the “bad boy”), but def not the “marrying kind”.

      the same theory holds true for who pays on the first date. something tells me you’ll be a gentleman and pay for future mrs. social kenny :o)

      • Same course lol! There’s a community of us.

        Women are always throwing out there the “insecure” line, or “this wouldn’t work on me” line.

        I really don’t believe that every girl I get with is insecure. Let me rephrase that; women on a whole, are very insecure and vain, so maybe you are right.

        Would you agree that women on a whole are insecure?

        • i really think he was a pua from cali! kenny, you didn’t read the 2nd part of my comment…insecure OR wants to hook up with a bad boy (or both).

          i think all women have insecurities and have been insecure at least once in their lives. however, the key is learning from these situations. if some lady is looking to get her rocks off with some stud, then more power to her. but if it’s a young girl looking for a loving relationship and is willing to sleep with a guy who is clearly not looking for anything serious… then that’s a problem

  2. commentary so far has been spot on. Insult/compliment sets the self esteem flag and once that is raised, there’s all manner boundary exploration that will go on, inch by inch until one party gets what hey want and the other gets what they have become accustomed to.

    Seeing everyone here is agreeing with each other and we cannot have that in a comments section, I will ask: How does a guy recover from an insult/compliment combo he tries on the wrong woman?

  3. That is pure PUA textbook bullshit. They really need a new guide.

  4. “Negging” isn’t something that is done that often anymore by the PUA community. There is a more complicated but worthwhile concept known as “Qualification.” Most guys see a pretty woman and immediately try to do things to impress her.

    What more confident and experienced men often do is recognize that a woman is attractive but that alone is not enough to impress them. As they approach and get to know the woman, they sub communicate interest without surrendering that the woman “has them.” That the woman must “qualify” herself as more worthwhile than just a pretty face.

    Negging essentially creates the air of disqualification but it’s a short cut. Unless the guy’s really got game, the girl will probably get bored with him and move on.

    • Wow Eltram: you got advanced info on the pickup theory! You’re quite right. Qualifying is a big thing nowadays. You broke it down better than I could. And it comes down to the mindset that the guy/PUA is the prize, thus the target has to show that she’s worth(qualify).
      Sent from my BlackBerry® device

  5. @Sex&Miami- I doubt we need a new guide.

    @Ang- Well the badboys in the bar is sort of the persona we aim to embody. Plus badboys are fun.

    • bad boys are fun when they are honest about being uncommitted bad boys (that way you know what to expect). it goes to another level when they bamboozle you with gifts and kindness, then use and abuse.

      so in essence, both of you agree w/ eachother (errr…somewhat). @kenny, from what you’ve been saying, you’re anti dazzle and bling and prefer woman to know you want to sex them up, if she is game, great if not, you’re not going to go out of your way trying to convince her @sex&miami, will know right off the bat that confusing tactics usually mean a no-go for a serious relationship and is interested in more than a bang

      key word here is: #honesty

  6. @Socialkenny, I don’t really think of it as guy is the prize so much. I just feel that “nice guys” surrender their personal power when they try to attract a woman. “Assholes” run too far in the other direction and initially some women respond to that because it is exciting to find a guy who is a challenge. But there is a medium I tend to strive for.

    So to address the question from earlier about paying for the date. If I’m still assessing where I fit into the woman’s perception and where the power is I may or may not offer to pay. At a bar and other guys have been buying her drinks the whole night? Definitely not. Meeting for coffee to get a feeling for one another? It’s more likely she pays for hers, I pay for mine. (Plus meeting, securing the table, then waiting in line together for me is a bit awkward.) But if I am taking her out on a date, I’d better be paying. And I know a lot of girls who feel strongly that’s exactly how it should be (except for not paying for drinks at the bar.)

  7. Pingback: PUA community… where you at? | How to Online Date

  8. Part of keeping the conversation light and fun with women is to tease them in a flirty way. A lot of guys just take things overboard and say something they really shouldn’t be saying. As far as paying for the first date, I have no problem doing that. I give myself a $20 limit with a $50 curve for first dates. Anymore than that and you come off as tricking. You end how you start with women

  9. I TOTALLY agree with your quick tips for guys!! I think it’s hilarious when guys think it’s fun to insult girls like we’re in elementary school again and then try to compliment them after, whether or not the compliment is inappropriate or not. They already messed up by insulting us, no girl in her right (secure) mind would accept that!! I think the only way I’d go for that after insults is if he begged profusely at my feet and called me “Your Highness” everyday. Haha j/k 😉 but you know what I mean!!

  10. When dudes try to ‘neg’ me, I see it as a sign of insecurity on their end. Depending on my mood I will exploit it or leave him alone. But I can never take him seriously after that.

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