Men, why so shy?

“Two drinks down, one to go… then she wont be able to resist…muhahah”

Hey there!  A recent post of mine was about the not so elusive PUA community.  For those that haven’t had the chance to read though, you can find it here.  Be sure to read the comments below for some answers/ observations to questions asked.  Before I continue, I would like to thank some members of this world for the insight you gave me.

Ladies, they’re not all bad… we just need to learn how to sense a douche from a gem… much like what we do day to day anyways.  Hint: if there is a recording device of any kind documenting your first encounter, most likely it’s not to show the grandkids.

The basic principle is giving men the confidence they need to approach a lady they are interested in…mostly.

This leaves me wondering: What is going on with men nowadays?

Every year that passes, men seem to get more and more timid.  What happened to the go-getter who wasn’t too shy to ask a woman out?  This man transformed into a delicate creature who is too afraid to even say “hi”.  Instead, he would gawk from afar, wait till the lady he has his eye on got herself drunk (with her own money mind you), then pull some Mike the Situation Jersey Shore creeper move.  It’s gotten to the point where men can barely “wink”, or send out an introductory email on an online dating site.

Are they that afraid of rejection?  Have we traumatized them so severely that they don’t even bother coming up at all anymore?  It almost seems that we switched roles and men are now the “fairer sex”.

A dating coach who commented on my last PUA blog brought up a good point and said this behavior has to do with competition.  There is always a bigger better someone out there, especially with all of these technological advances in finding a date, both sexes tend to get picky.  A little too picky.

He brings up a good point.

Random online dating tip (cause that’s what I do):

  • If a guy you meet online (or really any guy) refuses to call you, ever, and prefers to just text, even after you call and leave a message asking him to CALL you back, he’s just not interested.  And I’m not talking about one instance, I’m talking about never calling you.

What’s your take?  Why are men so shy?  Are we woman partly to blame?  Is technology at fault?  Maybe tv shows like Jersey Shore?  Am I the only one who loves the Dos Equis guy?  Why can’t they be like that guy?

Would love to hear from you!

*help me rule the world and follow me on twitter: @angiegomez1010 *


42 responses to “Men, why so shy?

  1. mmmmm…maybe it is because women are scary as hell?

  2. OMG i love that guy too! I think in Miami (south FL in general). That there is just to much eye candy everywhere on both sides. Even when there is a real connection with someone .There is just to much temptation. Eventually with lifetdtyle out here has a lot to do with it. Tech, yes, that has desntizedthe real meaning for meeting someone and waiting for them to call on the house phone. remember that? before cellz and interent. anybody remember that. That is what is missing I think.: )

    • have you seen the one where sasquash took a picture of him? haha

      oh the home line, i rememebr that, now it’s texts and social media

      btw: luv your new pic :o)

  3. Thank you . Yes I love all the Dos equis ads. They are the best. He is the most interesting man in the world .
    I would so date him. LMAO : )

  4. In my opinion, it has to do with the increase in reality television, social media, and technology (like you said). Half-bred celebrities on television influence us in a way that explicitly tells us to date only good-looking men and/or women. If you don’t see yourself as good-looking, then you instantly feel inferior, thus decreasing your courage of talking to that gorgeous man or woman. Also, texting, along with social media, is inhibiting one’s ability to speak face-to-face. Technology is too dynamic these days, making it hard for us to adapt. It’s definitely not women; it’s our society 😦

    • i guess it doesn’t help matters when girls like me watch the RealHouswives franchise :o)

      but on a serious note, as ive said before, we have to use technology as a tool…that way we can all win … hopefully! :o)

  5. @Ang- I’ll send you the bill later lol.

    Wow, you’ve been on a roll lately with the PUA posts. I love it. Keep it up.

    LMAO @ the recording device.

  6. As to your question; the biggest reason as to why men have tuned into pussies and not ge-getters anymore is “Online Dating”.

    With the surge of online dating over the years, men has since hide themselves behind the PC where he doesn’t have to approach women anymore. This led to massive amounts of social anxiety.

    What’s your take on that?

    • i think it’s sad, very sad. they have to go back to basics and use technology as an aid instead of a shield

      • Well that’s where the PUA community comes in. We advocate that men learn from us online(firstly), then take what we teach them to the real world. This is where in-field bootcamp comes in where the coach will take the students to a bar/club and let him lose
        Sent from my BlackBerry® device

  7. And how dare you single out my man Sitch as a creeper!! Mike is what we in the PUA community would call a “Natural”. Meaning he has Game and skills (gets laid), however he most likely has learned it naturally opposed to guys like me who learned in from the seduction/PUA community.

    • he is a skeezeball… not even a sleazeball, but a skeezeball! and he is unnatural in all ways from his orange skin tone to plastic hair.

      although, he is entertaining to watch (from afar)

      • LMBAO my man Sitch getting pounded. I don’t think there’s any girl who likes Sitch, but he uses what we call “asshole game” to get laid. And it works for him.
        Sent from my BlackBerry® device

  8. datingtheinternet

    “Mike the Situation Jersey Shore creeper move” – awesome.

    Just came across your blog. Love it.

  9. Why are men so shy?

    Articles like this don’t help – 🙂

    • woah…she is genius! thanks for sending!

      now you see what we have to go through, on a daily basis, past the age of 14…

      but as most things, all good things come to those that persevere :o)

  10. I don’t think there is such thing as the “fairer sex” (Something that was created and given as a label)…People have created an unrealistic expectation of what it is they think they want and what it is that they truly want. You can blame it on whatever you want, the bottom line is, we as a society have become too picky and unrealistic in dating/relationships. This was a good post – I enjoyed reading it.

  11. I agree with you a Social Kenny, although I think he suggested your suggestion in the previous post: it’s technology. Both sexes are getting pickier because there’s more avenues to meet people plus social anxiety of being behind the PC all the time.
    And the PUA community has really made me realize how clueless guys are and that’s why there’s a need for this community. I think both men and women struggle with confidence nowadays!

  12. So does everyone on here think that before online dating men were actually out there hitting on lots of women and getting laid all the time? I look at this like everything else in life where people can’t accept the real reason why something is happening so an excuse is made. Let’s be honest men are lazy and that is one of the main reasons. I might do a post on this on my blog because it requires a little bit of thought to explain the reasons properly. I actually had a conversation with Ross Jeffries the god father of the PUA community and the inspiration for Tom Cruise’s character in the movie Magnolia about how dating has changed and we both came to the conclusion that the issues with dating haven’t changed just the excuses people use to justify it.

    • haha…good point. or maybe they are just afraid of rejection? i don’t blame them, no one likes to get rejected, but it’s gotten to the point where they can’t even approach women, much less get laid! looking forward to your post :o)

      • I’ll try to write it up so it can go up next week. I have a few posts by some guest authors that are supposed to go up soon along with some things I have written that need to fall in a specific order so if I don’t get it done this week it probably won’t be posted until December.

  13. Pingback: Why Men Are Shy | smilepua

  14. singlewhitefemaledating

    Maybe as the years went by the “good ones” are snapped up and the rest… WELL dare I say it – lack social skills!! 😛

  15. Men lack social skills? I do not see women winning any such awards based upon these posts. Could there be a double standard here?

  16. I don’t think it’s so much that they are shy as they are becoming lazy. I think online dating has contributed to that behavior a little bit.

    It’s so easy for a man to sit in his bed or at his desk and type messages on dating sites to a ton of women and then sit back and see what comes in. I believe that “sit back and see what comes in” mentality carries over to their offline world.

  17. Bad habits? I guess that women will HAVE to approach (gasp) and
    actually risk rejection ( gasp) ,the way men do!

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