Hey there! As some of you read, I went back to my old stomping grounds in NYC not too long ago. In making the rounds seeing family and friends, I of course, went out drinking with bestie…duh.
Feeling, (and looking), fabulous. We went to a rooftop lounge somewhere downtown. Surprisingly, we were approached several times. I say surprisingly because when we were both single, there wasn’t a guy that was ballsy enough to say hi. They just gave creepy stares from afar. Now that we’re hitched and have some wrinkles, men were coming out of the woodwork.
This blog will discuss one in particular who had this sort of jackassy thing going on.
The scene: Bestie and I were on the rooftop drinking glasses of pinot like the classy ladies we are.
Note: I pretty much licked my glass dry because glasses of wine on Manhattan rooftop bars cost the same as a small gold nugget.
Anywho, this tall, thin, overtly punk-metrosexual guy came up to us. Think fancy suit jacket with a pocket square paired with skinny jeans (?) and converse sneakers. Upon talking (strictly for blog fodder), he confessed he was from Cali…
Ahhh, ok. So at least we knew the outfit was for real and he wasn’t a NYC poser.
All of a sudden, he looks down at me (cause he’s like 6’7″), and makes mention of my “industrial size bra straps” on my tank dress. Err yah. He then proceeds to say I have huge boobs and skinny arms. And… he’s a “tit guy”.
Granted, I have been out of the dating scene for a while now. Normally, I would have smacked the mohawk off of him. But I was stunned. Shocked. He caught me completely off guard. I have never, ever (even in my wild days), been spoken to that way.
Luckily, bestie wasn’t one to lose her composure, or icey stare. She said a few choice words and tall lanky guy slivered away.
So besides my initial thought of wtf is going on with guys today (which I’ll address in a future blog), I was left feeling insecure about my industrial size bra straps.
This brings up several questions:
- Do you always have to wear sexy under things even when no one other than you will see them?
- Whats a topheavy girl to do when the only thing strong enough to hold up the boobs are equally as large?
- And the age old question, do your bra and panties have to match?
I take pleasure in knowing I had non matching, full bottom, neon green panties that day and still felt sexy as ever (even after the jackhole encounter).
And an online dating tip so you can filter out assholes like these:
If a guy uses the word ‘tits’ in an email before meeting in person, most likely he’s not the marrying kind. Unless he’s a farmer and refers to them as ‘teets’.
Can anyone answer some of the above questions?
Would love to hear from you!
*help me rule the world and follow me on twitter: @angiegomez1010 *